Sometimes I’m scared the circus will assume that my roommate’s their laundry pile, scoop her up and take her away with them.
Oh god, this is fucking terrifying. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?!
It’s only a matter of time before my roommate starts wearing one of these. We have, like, a week at most.
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It scares me that it’s very possible she left the house looking like this.
Only two patterns (do psychotic squiggles count as a pattern?) and about 15 colors? I consider that a win.
She’s been wearing leotards on a daily basis for decades, and shows no signs of stopping.
Happy birthday, anonymous roommate.
Now don’t you wish you owned mesh underwear?
— my roommate, standing in front of the fan nekkidly.
I’ve been wracking my brain for how these outfits come about. Maybe she’s from a future so far advanced that understanding our clothing would be like a modern human understanding goldfish.
Or maybe she’s just lazy and secretly colorblind.
I swear she’s trolling me. I mean really—standing in front of that afghan in those leggings? My deepest fear is that one of these days my eyes will burn up in my head and she’ll just laugh and laugh.
To a normal human, winter is a time to wear warm clothes and perhaps even pants. To my roommate, winter is just an excuse to wear more brightly colored hoodies.